What is Prayer?
By Adam Kane
1/13/2006

 This question was just posed to me by an incredible woman that I've been working with. I feel that it's a question that all of us think we know the answer to- but may not have sat down to ponder it. Many of us just know that "it's a good thing" to say a prayer when we are in need of help or on behalf of someone else that is going through a challenging time. We pray for strength, we pray for loved ones, sometimes we even pray to manifest things- a sunny day for our child's ball game, a helping hand with that promotion at work, etc.

 However, all of this just scratches the surface of what prayer really is. For me, prayer is the act of communicating with the divine and with the spirit world. So summing up the concept of prayer by how we tend to pray in our everyday lives is like summing up a child's relationship with their parents by their asking for a cookie, a toy, or an extra hour before bedtime. Prayer is more than asking- it is communication, but communication on a deep level.

 Sometimes this communication is directed straight to the divine- we pray to God, Goddess, Spirit, etc. Sometimes we pray to the spirit worlds- we direct our communication to our spirit guides, our teachers, our allies, or our ancestors. And on certain miraculous moments- we pray to ourselves- we don't always realize this is our intent when we do this one. When we pray to ourselves we communicate to our true soul- the part of us that is pure spirit, unhindered by human emotion, thinking, and baggage. This is the type of prayer that we do when we "reach deep down inside" for strength or for the right answer. All of these types of communication through prayer are important- it is the type of communication that keeps us connected to the divine that is in all things.

 The type of communication that we do with prayer is just as important as who/what we are communicating with. We're probably all familiar with communicating to ask for something, but there is another form of communication that is just as important- prayers sent to honor and thank. The act of honoring or thanking someone is a natural part of our partnerships and relationships with each other- it's also part of our relationship with the divine. We say prayers of thanks over our meals, on special occasions or holidays, we even say a prayer of thanks in our every day language.. how many times have you used the expression "Thank God" or "Thank Goodness"?

 With prayers of honor, or prayers of thanks- we are again engaging in communication with the divine. We are thanking the divine, thanking our helping spirits, thanking the land, etc. I do feel it's important to be clear within ourselves on who we are communicating our prayers to. Not so that they are heard properly, but so that we are clear within ourselves. This clarity enables our relationship and partnership with the divine to strengthen and grow deeper. So that next time you "say grace"- be clear- you aren't just thanking the divine, but also thanking the spirits of the land, the plants, and the animals that provided the meal as well.

 This brings me to the last part of the question that was posed to me about prayer. Are prayers really answered, is it coincidence, or intent? Well the answer to this is found in the root of what prayer is. Prayer is communication- so for a "prayer to be answered" would imply that the prayer is responded to. In my personal beliefs I feel that if our intention is clear and our communication is clear then our prayers are always answered- we just might not always like the answer. Using the same analogy of a child asking for a cookie- sometimes the parent says "yes", and sometimes the answer is "no". Sometimes something is given instead of the cookie- and sometimes it's brussel sprouts. So, sometimes our prayers are answered exactly as we wanted them to be, sometimes we still get what we want but it's provided in a way we didn't conceive of. And sometimes we don't get what we want- but we still get what we need.

 In essence prayer is communication, pure and simple. What we can do as spiritual explorers in life is utilize that communication to forge stronger bonds. We can strengthen our relationships with the divine, with the spirits worlds, and with ourselves through prayer. So the next time you say a prayer, be mindful of the action. Pray with intention, pray with compassion, and pray as communication. Then watch and listen for how you are answered.